I’m really big on carp anyway… SCORE 73
Measures of success SCORE 81
To my wife and my children…. SCORE 131
A Flamingo SCORE 145
I had a lot of work to do today… SCORE 70
And he didn’t even finch SCORE 109
The only Donald for me SCORE 71
I Locked My Parents Out Of The Car SCORE 110
Crossing a river in Iceland. SCORE 116
Break eye contact and veer left. Towards the parking lot because malls are dumb. SCORE 89
200 calories worth of carrots vs. 200 calories worth of Kit Kats SCORE 59
Maybe it’s maybeline. SCORE 98
Be Lucy SCORE 77
If You’re Having An Affair SCORE 134
Create drunk, edit sober SCORE 33
I Need This Shower In My Life SCORE 82
My Man! SCORE 108
Only Snoop Dogg could be this smooth SCORE 95
Please Don’t Ask SCORE 76
And who says library’s aren’t cool? SCORE 113
Shiba is not pleased SCORE 74
Well played, Sharon… SCORE 79
…one thing led to another SCORE 115
When my friend, who works for the state, complains that she pays too much in taxes. SCORE 59
Dad: I’m On Some Flight Next To A Rapper… SCORE 93
Horses ARE cool SCORE 111
Choreographed sword fight SCORE 120
Mentally Unbalanced People SCORE 39
I hope there’s a place like this when I get old SCORE 248
How To Solve A Physics Problem SCORE 98
See The Good Side In A Bad Situation SCORE 107
I’m not ready yet SCORE 14