modern people aren’t built to survive in fantasy novels SCORE 14
donkey still hasn’t made waffles for shrek SCORE 11
soft pretzel crab SCORE 28
wrinkled irony SCORE 28
god must have been drunk when he came up with the idea for ducks SCORE 29
a new horcrux has been discovered SCORE 0
job well done. time to take a break SCORE 22
the size of the clock numbers won’t make a difference SCORE 24
data requires a manual SCORE 10
multi-colored squirrel only found in india SCORE 28
a cat making itself feel at home SCORE 8
he always gets so excited when we take him to the snack park SCORE 23
sorry cakey SCORE 20
when someone sees you singing alone in your car SCORE 22
i will never stop hitting “remind me tomorrow” SCORE 28
just going on another stupid walk for my stupid mental health look at the stupid flowers SCORE 24
how you end up making pancakes for a family of 120 instead of your modest family of 4 SCORE 24
if you own a cat, always watch your step SCORE 26
randomly pick eggs to keep your future food guessing SCORE 10
bob ross holding a baby raccoon in case you’re having a bad day SCORE 23
for lease navidad SCORE 21
don’t date people you feel like you have to hide things from – like your stuffed animals SCORE 32
you’re just fluffy, and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise! SCORE 7
never go to page two of google results SCORE 12
the email never finds me well SCORE 15
this would be the perfect car to get stuck behind in a rain storm SCORE 16
some people actually unpack when they come home from vacation SCORE 28
excuse me, i just need to ask you a few questions SCORE 17
pouring water on a spoon while doing the dishes SCORE 20
looking for a discount? Here’s a clever hack to try SCORE 17
no better way to start the day then by putting of the start of the day SCORE 19
all the pickles. you hear me? all. the. pickles! SCORE 19
