Time to rethink your brand name. SCORE 69
Me: Wait, you’re a Baskin Robbins AND a Dunkin Donuts?! Because I have an idea. Them: Let me get a manager. SCORE 103
My grandfather opened a plumbing business after WWII. The telephone number was "40". SCORE 95
Working as a non-smoker SCORE 85
Terrifying Fireproof Human Skull Logs For Camping Trip SCORE 99
Dear journal, I’m Fat SCORE 61
Gotta love Snake SCORE 83
Time to durr my hurr SCORE 96
Meeting my girlfriends parents.. SCORE 66
Totally SCORE 87
Sedimentary layer cake SCORE 94
I Keep Thinking Oh Man, I’m So Immature. SCORE 116
Weird SCORE 46
George R.R. Martin, ladies & gentlemen SCORE 147
Each booth is an alternate reality. SCORE 102
Moves like Jagger SCORE 90
Buying golf clubs around Glasgow on Facebook… SCORE 108
They know who we are.. SCORE 82
My cat recently discovered the dog bed SCORE 95
I’m Trying To Get Out Of The Shower SCORE 80
Under Water SCORE 98
When my wife lets the dishes and dirty laundry build up in hopes that I will do them. SCORE 64
Arby’s… SCORE 92
Can’t deny that spark SCORE 108
Jimmy Fallon …. SCORE 97
Don’t give in! SCORE 85
U May Think I’m A Horrible Person But… SCORE 89
She plays the "but I’m a little girl!" card way too often. SCORE 66
First Ever Monster Truck Front Flip! SCORE 79
They’re really stretching for things to criticise her for at this stage… SCORE 121
You had me at “ruse” SCORE 108
My reaction would be the same. SCORE 127
