make sure she knows your father material by texting “okay” and using the thumbs up emoji SCORE 17
terrible storytelling expert SCORE 33
Angry laundry machine noises SCORE 19
dogs only care about one thing and it’s disgusting SCORE 21
don’t open the blinds while i watch my stories SCORE 15
me watching you edit my google doc SCORE 14
good parenting 101 SCORE 44
if this doesn’t work i give up SCORE 12
we have been trying to reach you about your cars extended warranty SCORE 39
when you’re walking down the cereal aisle and see yourself in the security monitor SCORE 16
the one tool that makes it impossible to open your kitchen drawer every time SCORE 29
wishbone taught us all classic literature SCORE 35
cute winking cat SCORE 19
marked safe from dishonor SCORE 9
kids reminded this grown man that sometimes it’s healthy to just… act like a kid SCORE 87
a baseball bat by any other name is just a hit stick SCORE 13
there’s no time to explain, get in the pea SCORE 27
the moment you realize you’ve made a terrible mistake SCORE 32
every sneeze is dangerous when you’re an adult SCORE 26
and for no reason your life flashes before your eyes SCORE 29
depressed dog wanted to stay on vacation SCORE 26
extreme gardening SCORE 35
are you getting enough sleep? SCORE 14
the weezered of oz SCORE -2
children practice reading books to shelter dogs so they don’t feel alone SCORE 27
happy dog before and after asking to go outside and play in the snow SCORE 31
please just tell me what the book is about SCORE 35
checking on the banana bread SCORE 18
buddhist heaven is called… SCORE 26
ikea is grown up lego SCORE 22
he always wanted to get on a fire truck and finally built up the courage to ask SCORE 46
only using food, where do you live? SCORE 34
