don’t open the blinds while i watch my stories SCORE 15
when you’re walking down the cereal aisle and see yourself in the security monitor SCORE 16
terry pratchett understood all humans deserve to be treated fairly SCORE 32
kids reminded this grown man that sometimes it’s healthy to just… act like a kid SCORE 86
ikea is grown up lego SCORE 22
are you getting enough sleep? SCORE 14
children practice reading books to shelter dogs so they don’t feel alone SCORE 27
and for no reason your life flashes before your eyes SCORE 29
depressed dog wanted to stay on vacation SCORE 26
cute winking cat SCORE 19
terrible storytelling expert SCORE 32
good parenting 101 SCORE 44
there’s no time to explain, get in the pea SCORE 27
dogs only care about one thing and it’s disgusting SCORE 21
the weezered of oz SCORE -2
a baseball bat by any other name is just a hit stick SCORE 13
only using food, where do you live? SCORE 33
me watching you edit my google doc SCORE 14
if this doesn’t work i give up SCORE 12
he always wanted to get on a fire truck and finally built up the courage to ask SCORE 46
we have been trying to reach you about your cars extended warranty SCORE 39
happy dog before and after asking to go outside and play in the snow SCORE 31
buddhist heaven is called… SCORE 26
every sneeze is dangerous when you’re an adult SCORE 26
wishbone taught us all classic literature SCORE 35
make sure she knows your father material by texting “okay” and using the thumbs up emoji SCORE 17
the one tool that makes it impossible to open your kitchen drawer every time SCORE 29
marked safe from dishonor SCORE 9
checking on the banana bread SCORE 18
i just need 8-12 hours of alone time in the morning SCORE 27
extreme gardening SCORE 35
Angry laundry machine noises SCORE 19
