Your cat hates you. SCORE 148
I’m a multi-tasking procrastinator. SCORE 188
The trouble with being Canadian. SCORE 326
The future. SCORE 22
2pactopus SCORE 113
Literally all I ever see on Facebook SCORE 16
If Parks and Rec. characters were children’s books. SCORE 135
I can’t hear you. SCORE 23
Non-essential organ support group. SCORE 221
The power of barking SCORE 18
One big gelatinous ooze. SCORE 402
Come on in, the water’s fine! SCORE -14
Found my shirt. SCORE 117
Never trust a toddler. SCORE 82
When you have a snake as a roommate. SCORE 207
Complimentary air guitar. SCORE 10
The Twortle SCORE 142
When Tumblr gets deep. SCORE 441
I can’t wait to see this in my grandkids history books! SCORE 207
Research doesn’t lie. SCORE 229
You just can’t trust an Oompa Loompa. SCORE 186
Church of Rodel, Scotland SCORE 21
I like the sound you make when… SCORE 12
Why I don’t look out the window at night SCORE 193
Our nations finest quidditch players. SCORE 482
Scumbag NSA. SCORE 395
Unlikely lines from a cosmetics commercial. SCORE 455
The girl in our math problems. SCORE 546
How I view optimists, as a pessimist. SCORE 178
Good Guy Dave. SCORE 461
George R.R. Martin vs. J. K. Rowling. SCORE 22
Shotgun vs. Rosa parks. SCORE 291
